Tuesday, January 31, 2023
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Love in the Time of Hog Heads and Habitual Liars

Scientists are racing the clock to find a cure for the Pinnochio Effect, as Republican fabulists contend with a frightening and inexplicable period of rapid skull expansion in the post-Trump era.

U.S. Lawmakers to Introduce Robotic Citizens

Congressional Republicans and Democrats announced a tentative agreement Thursday to replace poor and middle class Americans with robots and artificial intelligence (AI) by 2020....

Veterinarians Label Sanders a Chocolate Lab

Presidential Candidate Bernie Sanders is the political equivalent of a chocolate lab, according to a recent poll of 500 veterinarians by the American Kennel...

Who wore it better?

The working class heroes laboring on your behalf here at The Cynical Times are always on the lookout for a new way to add...

The Cynical Times endorses peaceful revolution at The Bernie Box

I respectfully disagree with those who say choosing Bernie Sanders over Hillary Rodham Clinton is solely the province of the young and naive. I feel the same way as the kids do and I'm 51. Many of my age-mates are of a similar mind.

That’s why The Cynical Times is endorsing Bernie Sanders for president. It's the first real endorsement in the history of this news and satire website devoted to the faltering middle class.

I worked in the mainstream news media for more than 30 years before it was taken over by right-wing monied interests. During that time I covered both politics and economics in Washington, D.C., rubbing elbows with everyone from Alan Greenspan to Jeb Bush to Cory Booker; covered cops and courts in Newark, the Bronx and South Florida; covered energy, insurance and banking at the national and global level; and our military overseas.

I am wholly convinced that the naive view right now in America is held by those who believe they can present our shrinking middle class with another choice between two Wall Street agents and call it a proper election. Because that's what the U.S. has had every year since Jimmy Carter ran for our nation's highest office in 1976 and that's why our voter turnout is among the lowest in the so-called developed world.

Most Americans want to vote against both the Wall Street money machine and against the K-Street political lobbyists, and have been wanting to do so for some time. However, there's usually no meaningful way to do so. Until now.

That's why The Cynical Times is feeling The Bern.


Sanders battles Clinton to Iowa tie

Political Outsider Bernie Sanders fought Wall Street favorite Hillary Clinton to a virtual standstill in Monday’s Iowa Caucus, the first state primary election of the 2016 presidential race.

The outcome spells trouble for the monied interests which have controlled the federal government since 1980, orchestrating a huge shift in wealth from the middle class to the privileged 1 Percent.


Because Iowa Caucus voters tend to be whiter and more affluent than those in the nation as a whole, and more insulated from the economic downturns which have battered more populous regions. They’re less of a microcosm of the nation for those reasons than a microcosm of the nation’s affluent whites.

All of which raises a troubling question for Clinton: If Sanders can claim half of Iowa Democrats, what can the enemy of savage capitalism do in New York, Michigan, Florida, Illinois California and Texas – areas hard hit by the Country Club Set's ruthless offshoring of U.S. manufacturing jobs to boost corporate profit growth?

Sanders had 49.6 percent of the Iowa Democratic vote at 1:55 a.m. EST Tuesday morning, with 99 percent of the precincts reporting. Clinton was able to garner just just 49.9 percent despite her nearly unlimited campaign warchest and potential status as the first female president in U.S. history.

Religious nut Ted Cruz won the Republic Caucus, with 28 percent of the vote. He edged out Reality TV Star Donald Trump, who was second with 24 percent. U.S. Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) led the nine other passengers in the Republican clown car. All but Trump are palatable to the Koch Brothers, a group of energy industry magnates who have all but taken over the GOP by vowing to spend $900 million to get one of their lackeys into the nation's highest office.

For a sneak peak inside the Iowa Caucus click https://www.cynicaltimes.org/articles/fear-and-loathing-in-des-moines-335.htm