Political Hookers Resurrect Keystone Pipeline


Apparently, no one in the mainstream news media saw the Keystone Pipeline being resurrected by our Korrupt Korporatist Kongress after the presidential election. Even though we predicted it four times at The Cynical Times.

How did we know?

We understand the U.S. is no longer either a functioning democracy or even a functioning society, where policy is crafted to advance the greater good.

Instead, our government is a protection racket in which political hookers auction public policy to big corporations in what can only be described as Kongressional profit sharing. Our elected officials wash the bribe money clean through excessive speaking fees, insider trading tips, donations to their family charities, and low-show jobs for their pampered offspring.

It’s a government whose sole purpose is to expand its income from legalized bribes in much the same way big business grows profit and revenue each quarter to curry favor with investors.

“Look for TPP to be passed by our treasonous Congress rKey3egardless of whether we have a multi-millionaire or a billionaire in The White House next year,” we wrote in September. “Same goes for the Keystone Pipeline.


“Because the faltering middle class counts for nothing in this nation anymore. Our society is no longer a functioning democracy, as former U.S. President Jimmy Carter has pointed out. Its morphed into a corporate profit growth machine gone mad.”

As a nation we’ve become as dysfunctional as Boston Market just before its 1998 bankruptcy, when it charged $15 for the equivalent of an an airline lunch; as clueless as Sports Authority when it charged more than $50 for a $5 T-shirt before going belly up last year; and as confused as Blackberry when it was charging $900 for a smartphone with no apps just before it quit the handset market. Like them, our future is just as dim and unstable.

Remember that Tom Foolery about bringing business skills into government?

We’re living it.

divideThe painful truth is that a proper government in a functioning democracy is never a business. The other painful truth is that business is no longer really business in the corporate oligarchy we have become.

At least not for the publicly traded companies with stock tickers whose shares are bought and sold via venues like The New York Stock Exchange.

The moment a business enterprise issues a stock ticker their business stops being chicken, sporting gear or electronics and starts being stock manipulation.

Customers are as irrelevant to them as readers are to the mainstream news media now, voters are to contests between dueling Wall Street candidates, and global warming is to Trump’s head of the Environment Protection Agency.

None of this madness is sustainable.

The end is coming and PDQ. And the klown that is President Donald J. Trump is the bellwhether.

Trump is such a shameless liar that you can just assume the exact opposite of whatever he says to the masses he privately disdains.

gop1Take his statement Friday about issuing a president permit for the $8 billion pipeline.

“Today we take one more step in putting the jobs, wages, and economic security of American citizens first,” Trump said.

Translation: “Today. we successfully auctioned U.S. public policy to the highest bidder. As long as TransCanada and the rest of the global oil industry participate in this political protection racket they can do as they wish.”

Trump’s claim that the fourth phase of the Keystone Pipeline system will create 42,100 jobs is knowing bullshit.

The painful truth is that pipelines don’t create a lot of jobs once they’re finished. It’s not like people are sitting along the route pushing the oil through with kayak paddles. The damn things are automated. 

The true job creation number for Keystone XL is probably one job for each of the pumping stations built at 30 to 60 mile intervals. And they don’t all need to be staffed simultaneously.

That works out to 30 to 60 jobs. Not 42,100.dep8

So where does the 42,100 figure come from?

The bullshit artists who craft inflated economic impact figures like this one love to count each piece of construction work as a new job.

Let’s pretend for a second that you’re a welder. You might work on 10 or 20 different projects each year. The bullshit artists count each one as a new job. Even though it’s the same job and you’re the same person every time.

Why does the Korrupt Korporate Kongress lie to voters with such grinding and insulting regularity?

Because the number of reflexive rule followers who actually believe Faux News has reached such huge numbers that those of us in what the far right euphemistically calls “the reality-based community” don’t really matter anymore.

Ain’t no room for painful truths in a nation of dueling political liars.



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