Tuesday, April 20, 2021
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Love in the Time of Hog Heads and Habitual Liars

Scientists are racing the clock to find a cure for the Pinnochio Effect, as Republican fabulists contend with a frightening and inexplicable period of rapid skull expansion in the post-Trump era.

Dotard President Oversees Deadliest Period in U.S. History

The Moron President's mishandling of the Covid-19 pandemic has led The United States into the deadliest period in its 244-year history. The previous record? The U.S. Civil War. It generated an average of 504 deaths a day – about half of the current Covid death rate. About 20 Americans are dying each day right now for each U.S. combat death at the height of The Vietnam War – when our military averaged 46 fatalities a day in 1968.

The Epic Bullshit of January Home Sales

The Wall Street cheerleaders at CNBC would like you to believe new home sales surged to their highest level in more than...

The Trump Challenge: Tell Ruskies “Fuck Off”

The problem with the United States right now is that most Americans would hire a Mexican day laborer to carry their burden of citizenship...

God Admits Mistakes, Regrets Past Failures

God expressed regret for his failure to prevent genocide, natural disaster, poverty, war, child abuse, and The Moron Presidency on Thursday, acknowledging for the...

U.S. Lawmakers to Introduce Robotic Citizens

Congressional Republicans and Democrats announced a tentative agreement Thursday to replace poor and middle class Americans with robots and artificial intelligence (AI) by 2020....

Top Florida Dem Trips Over Dick

The Democratic Party's incoming Florida Senate leader resigned amid a sex scandal, opening the door to further Republican gains at a time when the GOP is busily undermining democracy across the nation.

Hillary is Not The Anti-Trump

It still stuns me to hear Hillary Clinton blame her defeat in the 2016 presidential race on anything but the $153 million she accepted...

Liberal shooter targets DC baseball game

Sadly, it has come to this. Open violence in the streets against members of a Corrupt Corporate Congress who habitually turn a blind eye to...

Cynical Times editor trolls Clinton stronghold

Victor Epstein was cruising his Facebook timeline alone Thursday afternoon, buck naked in the privacy of his living room, when the break in the social...

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